Terrible Thursday

I painstakingly dragged myself out of the comfortable bed and slowly strolled my way to MRT.
Got back my SPSS results, 100/100.
DBE deadline next week. dance training.
My body is aching like mad.
But my mind refuses to stop.
I'm crying so badly right now that I am shaking while I'm furiously slamming my finger against the keyboard
I'm so frustrated. so damn frustrated.
I need a hug, I need somebody to rely on. I can't be relying on myself for the whole time isn't?
I don't feel lonely. I feel weak.
Idk how to describe this kind of weird feeling. I guess it's just the hormones.
But why. Why now? Why not earlier?
I had a nightmare. So awful that I can feel my heart sink and my soul jumping out of my body that kind of feeling when i wake up.
I don't want to go through the same thing again. I'm afraid. I'm scared. I'm scared. I am damn scared.
What if I don't want to compromise. How about understanding? Am I up to this?
What am i even talking about right now.

Should just cry myself to sleep tonight. It has been a really rough month. Too many people leaving.